Wednesday Words of Advice

If you teach your children the proper names for their private parts- be prepared for embarassment.

About two years ago Sister was having accidents at daycare so her teacher called me to tell me she suspected a bladder infection.  So I called the doctor and made an appointment.  I then called the daycare teacher back to tell her I would be picking up Sister in a couple of hours.  Sister was assured by her teacher that I would pick her up soon and take her to the doctor so the doctor could make her feel better.

A little while later, the daycare teacher's assistant arrived while the children were all outside playing.  Sister spotted her across the yard and proceeded to yell, in her loudest voice:

"Hey Jen, my mom's coming to pick me up to take me to the doctor so he can fix my vagina!"  And if that wasn't enough- Jen didn't hear what she said and asked her to repeat it- before the teacher could cut her off.  Sister repeated the whole thing.  Oh dear.

Sister and I had a little talk later that day- not everyone wants to know what's going on with our body- so we will keep it between us.  And that worked for a while, until she decided to talk about "it" in the grocery store one day...

If you would like to see more words of advice- check out Willowjak's Blog.

What freaks me out

Today I had a few "freak-out" moments.  Ok I admit it, I am high-strung at times.  But when something sets me on edge I have a hard time shaking it.  One of the things that freaked me out today was when I dropped my iPhone.  It bounced. Twice- and the sim card popped out.  When I put it all back together it was telling me "no service".  I thought for sure I had broken my iPhone- which by the way is my only phone as we don't have a house phone.  And- I was across town with a car that was sounding like it wanted to die. 
I walked across the street to the cell phone store (at least I dropped my phone in a convenient place).  I handed the phone to the polite Japanese girl and told her what happened.  So she starts fiddling with the phone wearing a very concerned look on her face (at least that is what I interpreted that look to be).  It turns out she was checking out her cuticles.  And voila!- she got it to work again.  I wanted to hug and kiss her- but that would probably "freak" her out.

Here is my top ten list of things that freak me out.  This is not the same as things that scare me- the things that scare me include losing my family, getting in a horrible car crash- legitimate fears that I am sure I share with a majority of the population. 

These are things that cause me to go into panic mode.  Usually it's all internal, but everyone once in a while people can tell I am freaking out. ;)

1. When my car sounds like it is going to die on me in the middle of traffic.  It did that today- on a hill.  You know- that little sputter thing that cars do when they want to just take a nap right there on the spot.

2. When animals run across the road while I am driving.  I hit a cat once- I felt so bad.  I tried to find the poor thing- and almost got hit myself in the process.  I avoided that road for a long time after that.  Hubby has been angered more than once when driving and a cute bunny rabbit hops across the road- and I freak out like we are about to slam into a large semi.

3. Running late to the airport.  I hate that feeling that I am going to miss a flight and possibly ruin a trip I am about to take.  I am one of those people that likes to get to the airport like a day in advance- to be on the safe side.

4. Thinking I lost something- like my wallet or car keys.  This is especially true now that I live in a foreign country.

5. When the phone rings at 2 am.  No one calls at that time in the morning with happy news...  Unless of course they have a wrong number.  I have a hard time going back to sleep after that happens.

6. When a major household appliance does not work.  This is especially true of of our house back in Washington that we are renting out.  I got an email early this morning saying they (the renters) were having trouble getting the heat to come on.  Turns out it was just a light switch that needed to be flipped up.  I was convinced we were going to have to buy a new furnace.  (That still could happen so I will knock on wood.)

7. Thinking that I made someone mad at me.  I am very sensitive to people's moods.  So if someone is having a bad day I automatically think it has to do with me.  (Because it is ALL about ME, right?)  This true for hubby too.  I start feeling bad about something I didn't know I did or didn't do- just based on his bad mood or if he is too quiet.

8. When I have a wardrobe mishap- just before I am about to go somewhere.  I had a beautiful silk dress I bought at Macy's before we came here.  I meant to wear it to the Khaki Ball.  I should have taken it to the cleaners to steam out the wrinkles for me.  I tried ironing the day of the event- only to get a huge water spot on it.  So I had to wear something else.  I was so distraught that I didn't even want to go the event- even though I was the one who insisted Hubby get us tickets.  (I did have a good time that night inspite of myself.)

9. When my computer acts up on me.  This applies to technology in general.  I get so upset thinking about all the money spent- only to have the damn thing not work. GRRRR

10. MOVING.  It is stressful- that is a given.  But so many aspects of it just send me on a whirlwind of freak-outs.  Read my posts about getting a passport- there is a good example.  My co-workers got to see me freak out every time I called those damn people in the passport office.  I was completely over the top freaked out that I wasn't going to get a passport- therefore not be able to move to Japan- therefore not be able to see Hubby for a long long time.  DOUBLE GRRRR

I think that is it, it should be, well maybe I could add a few more things, or a lot more...  I told you I am high-strung didn't I?

What freaks you out?

Sweet Potato Digging

Sister just joined Girl Scouts this year. Today we had the lovely opportunity to pick sweet potatoes with a group of Japanese Girl Scouts- I think they are actually called "Girl Guides".
We had a chaotic start.  It is hard enough to navigate through the train stations and even harder with a large group.  You can bet we were quite the sight.  The locals were surrounded by loud boisterous American girls.  After getting on and off I would say two too many trains- we arrived at Kurokowa.  I must mention that my train map shown below is like my Bible for navigating my way through this crazy tangled web of train lines.  Now I just need a map for every train station so I can find the way to right train line when I need to transfer.  That is wishful thinking of course.

I never leave home without my train map

Our Girl Guides met us outside the train station and they led the way to the farm where we would dig for sweet potatoes.  Tokyo really is a concrete jungle- you would think you would have to travel out to the country to find any agriculture.  One simple turn around the corner we see up ahead green hills, small green hills.  When we get to the top we find a good size field, or I should say fields.  It reminds me of the berry farms in Washington where you pick your own fruit.  Here they had peanuts and sweet potatoes.  There were other fields- but I am not sure what was growing there.  I wouldn't have know about the peanuts- but Sister saw a group pulling big green plants out of the ground.  Dangling underneath them were peanuts- very cool.  So our girls all got to pick a root and start digging.

Sister dug up three very large sweet potatoes.  I actually think they are more like yams- they are longer than sweet potatoes I think.  We are going to attempt making sweet potato pie with it.  After a group picture we all said thank you to the farmers- "Arigato Gozaimasu!"  The farmers bowed in return and gave us big smiles- I just love that.

     The Girl Guides are in blue with the cute blue hats.

After another uphill hike- we arrived at a community center where we would eat lunch.  They served us something called nagashi soumen- "floating noodles".  The girls loved this.  What they do is take bamboo (cut in half  to make a spout) up on a stand and run water through it.  At the end is a bowl with a strainer in it.  Then they take the soumen noodles and drop them in the water.  The object of the "game" is to catch the noodles with your chopcticks before they float away (hence the bowl at the end to catch them.)  Then you put them in your bowl that has a sort of soy sauce broth in it along with thinly sliced onions.  It is quite tasty.  Sister became a pro at it.  In fact she went back for more and came back with a huge bowl full of noodles- much to my chagrin.  When my turn came up the ladies also dropped cherry tomatoes in with the noodles- making it more challenging. I am proud to say I use my chopsticks very well.

After lunch the girls exchanged "swaps" (little cards the girls decorated) and then did a craft together.

Demonstrating the craft

When it was time to go- the Girl Guides made a tunnel for our girls to walk through- saying "goodbye!".  Once we were assembled on the other side we sang to them- "Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold."  It is a Girl Scout song I remember from when I was a Girl Scout myself.  The Girl Guides surprised us by singing the same song back to us- but in Japanese.  There are no words for how that made me feel.  It was so heartfelt and genuine.  I have a soft spot in my heart for them.  I hope Sister remembers what a special moment that was- if not I will have to remind her.

the "tunnel" they made for us to walk through

I am falling in love with this country.  It makes me sad to think we will have to leave eventually.  Maybe I will be ready to go once that times comes- but for now I am going to enjoy it all I can.

Regrets and Promises

Do you ever have those thoughts that stick around the back of your mind that just give that sinking feeling- the "why did I do that?" or "why didn't I do that?"  Maybe everyone does- every once in a while I feel plagued by those thoughts.  My big regret right now is Brother's teeth.  We had him get braces to correct his underbite- but we had to do it quickly since we were moving to Japan.  The orthodontist convinced me that they would not be able to treat him here- since the Navy is understaffed in the way of orthodontics.  I think I just threw away $800 (my half of the cost of his braces.)  The braces were removed just before we flew out here- literally the day before (I wrote about this previously.)  His underbite had not been corrected- but there was an improvement and his front teeth looked beautiful and straight.

Brother just before getting his braces.

Here is the problem- he is 10 years old.  A 10 year old that has to be reminded to wear his retainer, a 10 year old that kept forgetting to wear his retainer.  It got to the point that the retainer did not fit correctly in his mouth- I could see that his front teeth were spreading out again.  Last week he came hom from school and showed me his retainer- it was in two pieces.  It was in his backpack and someone stepped on it at school.
What could I say?  We obviously can't fly back to the states to get a new retainer.  I keep thinking there has to be a solution here- but I think it will involve getting the braces back on.  We'll see if I am successful or not.
I know I can't be there at school with my son to be sure he puts his retainer in the plastic case to keep it from getting broken while he's eating lunch.  But I still feel responsible.  I did not make sure he had his retainer in every night.  Some nights I tucked him in and knew his retainer was downstairs in the kitchen- but we were both too tired to get it.

After braces- before the retainer broke. (In the train station in Shinjuku)

I kept saying to myself the reason I was tired all the time was because the move and this crazy year had worn me completely out.  That is true to a point.  It has been one hell of a year.  But...  Truth is I wasn't taking care of myself and haven't done so in a very long time.  I have an underactive thyroid that I take Synthroid for.  These past months I have not been consistent in taking it like I should.  I even let the prescription run out.  I convinced myself that it wasn't that important.  I can miss a dose and not feel the effects immediately.  It is more of a gradual process.  Eventually I lost all motivation and felt utterly exhausted- even with a good night's sleep.  Everything was feeling like a huge effort, my hair was looking terrible and I was gaining weight.  All signs of low levels of thryoid. 
I finally saw the doctor here.  He wrote me a new 'scrip.  5 days later I feel so much better!  I have energy again and feel motivated once again. 
I deserve a big slap upside my forehead- a "you coulda had a V-8" kind of slap. 
I don't know if I really could have avoided Brother's mishap with his retainer- but I do know I could have been more vigilant about making him wear it every night.  This is really going to bother me for a while.  His teeth almost look like they did before the braces- it makes me feel sick to my stomach.  I hope to find a solution soon.
The moral of the story- we have to take care of ourselves- otherwise we can't properly take care of others.  I have made a promise to myself to make sure to take my meds like I should, exercise every day (even if its just walking), and to make good choices when I eat.  I deserve to take care of myself- and my children deserve that I take good care of them.  This especially important now that I am playing single mom again.


PS- I changed the name of my blog to Living overseas as opposed to moving overseas- I am trying to put the "moving" part behind me!

From a sweet friend

My first award! Stacey from Willowjak Boys
is doing what she can to encourage me to blog more often. I think its working! Of course she is such an inspiration to me- I don't know how she does it! I think there is a secret potion out there that she is keeping to herself. One of these days I am going to meet her in person- we have known each other for over 6 years- but only by email and Christmas cards. Check out her blog- she will either make you laugh, cry, and just leave you feeling empowered and inspired. Seriously.

http://willowjak.blogspot.com/

Oh- my award- I am still pretty blogilliterate- so it has taken me all day to figure out what she meant when she told me she gave me an award. This is actually quite fun- though I am afraid I am not sure I know enough bloggers to pass on the award.

This award comes with some rules and then some fun!

Rules:
1. You Can Only Use One Word!
2. Pass this along to 6 of your favourite bloggers!
3. Alert them that you have given them this award!
4. Have Fun!



The Fun Part:
1. Where is your cell phone? charging
2. Your hair? bad
3. Your mother? Karen
4. Your father? Dennis
5. Your favorite food? sushi
6. Your dream last night? boss
7. Your favorite drink? tea
8. Your dream/goal? create
9. What room are you in? living
10. Your hobby? anything
11. Your fear? losing
12. Favorite place to eat? home
13. Where were you last night? home
14. Something that you aren’t? athletic
15. Muffins? chocolate
16. Wish list item? curtains
17. Where did you grow up? California
18. Last thing you did? emailed
19. What are you wearing? jammies
20. Your TV? news
21. Your pets? Brownie
22. Friends? treasured
23. Your life? complicated
24. Your mood? lonely
25. Missing someone? Hubby
26. Vehicle? Toyota
27. Something you’re not wearing? bra
28. Your favorite store? Japanese
29. Your favorite color? red
30. When was the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? Thursday
32. Your best friend? Dianne
33. One place that I go to over and over? commissary
34. One person who emails me regularly? Hubby


I'm sharing the love with:

1. Confessions of a 30-something Girl... http://slightlysingle30.blogspot.com/

2. Kristina's Favorites http://kristinasfavorites.blogspot.com/

Sorry that is all I can come up for my 6- I need to be more social I guess...

Thanks Stacey- that was fun!

Typhoons and Deployments

My sweetie is deployed again. This time it will be a shorter trip- hopefully he will be back in time for the holidays. It still sucks to see him leave again of course.
It never ceases to amaze me how we (hubby and I) behave before he leaves. You would think we would be cuddling and savoring every last moment together. Not quite. Husband almost always withdraws and finds something to occupy his time- usually the computer. It is a cycle of deployment I know and actually not unusual for someone to do prior to a big separation. Of course I want him to help around the house and make things easier for when he leaves. Instead he makes a huge mess packing his gear and then proceeds to ignore the world around him. This time around I was infuriated. So I started nagging at everyone for not picking up after themselves (in my defense they were all like mini tornadoes that day). Hubby just kept his distance. I think he knew- I was angry that he had to leave again. I am supposed to be a seasoned Navy wife- but I still get angry.
The next morning was better (he was to leave that night)- we were actually talking and cuddling. That night we were to drive him to where the buses were coming to pick him up to take him to the ship. Gathering his last minute items and putting on his uniform- Hubby was swearing and stomping around the house. I asked him what was wrong but I only received an incoherent response- so I kept my distance. I did notice he was sweating and then he started sniffling. His eyes were full of tears he was fighting to hold back. I hate seeing him like that.
We drove to the bus stop and waited with him for the bus to come. When the bus arrived he gave me a big hug- I could hear him literally choking back the sobs that were fighting their way out. I told myself not to cry. If I cry- the kids cry. Besides- I had already cried the night before. We waved goodbye to him and walked to our car. The kids took it very well- I am proud of them.

The next day they are telling us Super Typhoon Melor is headed for Japan. I was not too worried- we have had a typhoon warning before and nothing came of it. A couple of days later Super Typhoon Melor was downgraded to a plain old Typhoon Melor. But the base was telling us to be prepared- it was still headed our way. Next thing we know school is going to be closed and the base was to be shut down. Well- that is kind of serious huh?

(Typhoon Melor is still on the move)

Funny that the ship pulled out just in time- just leave us behind with a Typhoon right? I know it wasn't planned but what timing huh? So I cleaned the house, stocked up with water, flashlights, batteries, candles and food. We hunkered down for the storm. It was eerily quiet before it all began. There really is a calm before the storm. I stayed up quite late to watch the storm- I admit I was excited in a way. I did eventually get to sleep- and woke up at 3am to the sound of thunder. Sister woke up and came in my bed- she was frightened. I was a little frightened as well- it was pretty nasty outside and I was worried the power would go out. I knew the eye was getting close- there was no telling what it would do.
I actually slept through most of the eye of the storm. When I woke up it was still crazy outside- but obviously we were all going to be okay. It eventually stopped raining and the sun came out. it was the oddest thing- the wind was still whipping at the trees- yet the sun was shining like it was the middle of summer. Every once in a while a storm cloud would pass and it would get dark for a moment or two. I walked outside to get something out of my car- so strange not to see a soul outside- it was all very quiet. Once the wind died down the "all clear" was given and all of the sudden there were children everywhere. I made the kids go outside and enjoy the sunshine. I needed a reprieve.
That evening it got dark very quickly. The air smelled different- it was cleaner somehow. My friend said it was like fresh washed linen- I had to agree.

We have had quite a week. It feels like at least two weeks have passed since Husband left- but in fact it has only been 5. That is a lot to take all in a matter of 5 days. Somehow I feel refreshed and energized, inspired even. I wonder why that is?

Feeling Inspired

Today I attended the first day of a 3 day course called Compass. Basically it is an in doc class for new Navy wives. Married for over 13 years to a sailor, I am not a new Navy wife. However, this class was NOT offered when I first got married. They just started Compass a few years ago I believe. I was inspired to take the class for two reasons. The first being that there is probably something or something(s) I can take away from the class. The second is that I am interested in becoming a mentor and would like to help teach the class. So far, my interest is peaked. The first thing they stress when the class starts is that there is no rank among us Navy wives. I think that is awesome because Lord knows as a new Navy wife many years back i was quite intimidated by the officer's and upper enlisted's wives. Not that there was anyone that treated me poorly- but still...

All this knowledge and experience I have must be put to use! Haha, I sound quite full of myself. Honestly, if I can help at least one new wife, it will be worth it. The lady in charge of the program is actually husband's boss's wife. She is a very very sweet lady who sent me many emails before I arrived- emails packed with loads of useful information and advice about moving here. She also wants me to be a mentor- how could I refuse her?

Today we learned some Naval history, about our benefits as Navy wives, etiquette, and resources that are available. Much of this would have been very useful to me when I was a new wife. Lucky for me I was resourceful and was brave enough to venture out and meet other wives. Some are not so brave. Some are scared away by rumors they hear. Believe it or not- there are some Navy wives that don't like Navy wives! They refuse to socialize with their own kind. Granted- the military brings on a mix of people from all walks of life, and many corners of the world. This can be a wonderful thing in that you get to meet some very interesting people. You can also meet some very strange people who think so differently from you that they might as well be from another planet. Well, maybe not that bad- but still... Some new wives are very young- I mean they just left their parents home for the first time and have never been on their own. They have an especially hard time. Many of them cannot make it without some sort of support system. It is awesome that the Navy has started to make an effort in the past few years to try offer new and better resources.

So what I am getting at is that I have a great opportunity here. The ladies that are presenting the class actually are coming from a different base. They want to start a program at the base at which I live at now. So here is my chance to really make a difference in the quality of life for the spouses here. And of course I will benefit from more than just the warm fuzzy feelings o having down something good- I will also have something to write down on my resume. So when I am asked- "what did you do while in Japan?"- I can say I did more than sight see and eats lots of delicious food.

It feels good to have a purpose here now. Hopefully this turns out to be a good thing!