Help me, I am over reacting to something I should be above over reacting to. It has to do with an 11 year old kid and his co-horts. Lately it seems these kids have just become meaner than normal. I give them slack because they are Navy kids, and I understand the stress of being a military child and dealing with deployments and such.
Realizing I am over reacting, I wonder what kind of reaction I SHOULD have? A few pre-teen neighborhood kids (and therefore schoomates of my children) have caught my attention with their bullying, foul language, disrespect and littering around the area. I am at the point where I want to start visiting some parents. One of the bully's, whom I suspect has been picking on Sissy and her BFF, has started picking on Brother again. This was an issue we had at the start of school- a problem I thought had resolved itself. I think the truth is that Brother has learned to ignore him for the most part. Recently Brother has started to complain about being bullied again. Sissy came and got me one day to tell me that said Bully was picking on her and her BFF. As it turns out, it looked like Sissy was stirring up trouble that day. I still had a talk with the boy- in a friendly yet authoritive manner. I suspected he had picked on the girls in the past- the fact that he and his co-horts wouldn't make eye contact made that evident.
This week the bully has been picking on Brother because of the rash that Brother has on his face (doc thinks he had some kind of allergic reaction to something.) Then today Brother tells me that this kid told him that I am "ugly" and a "bitch". I told Brother that I don't care, which I don't. But in a way- I do. What is wrong with me- why does this kid chap my hide. Why does the other neighborhood kid who is always cussing make my hand itch and want to track down his mama? Why do I wish that it be ok for Brother to knock the kid who is bullying him, on his @ss?
Brother needs to learn how to deal with this- and I definitely will not help by fighting his fights for him. It just brings out the protective mama bear in me. The fact is I need to stay out of the kids' affairs and not get caught up in the drama. I don't get caught up in "adult" drama, why get into the kids'?
But.
I WILL say something to any older kid that picks on Sissy or her BFF. I WILL seek out their mother if need be. I WILL say something to the child who swears in my presense.
I WILL calm down
Eventually...
Have you ever dealt with bullies? What did you do?
My kids are only 2 and 6 so I think they're still a little young to have a bullying issue. But I"m soooo dreading that when they get older. My daughter is a scrapper, and I can't imagine she wouldn't tell a bully to stuff it. But my son, hmmm, I don't know how he would handle it. But I"m like you, I have no problem approaching another mom and having a little chat. You would think military kids would have better attitudes. I KNOW my husband and I would never stand it if we thought our own children were bullies.
ReplyDeleteSorry, no advice. Good luck!